


Being Brave

by S1rcus



Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: F/F, Future Fic, Internalized Homophobia, Like at least mention as from the past but overcome, both jade and Tori are lesbians, maybe???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:07:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,706
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25135144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/S1rcus/pseuds/S1rcus
Summary: After five years apart the group of friends see each other as a full group again. Some old suppressed feelings rise up as Jade and Tori face each other again, both after learning a thing or two about themselves in college.
Relationships: Minor or Background Relationship(s), Sam Puckett/Jade West, Tori Vega/Jade West
Comments: 2
Kudos: 75





	Being Brave

**Author's Note:**

> So this thing here is something I started a year ago and only now got around to finish. I think this tells so well how good my writing process is and especially how good I'm at sticking one thing at a time. I just always need something to fill some gaps and can't figure what so they just sit in my folders. But I did it! Now I just have ten other things waiting.  
> Also mention of Hayley Kiyoko in there because how can you do a fic of a lesbian singer without mentioning her?

It had been five years since the group of friends from Hollywood Arts had separated their own ways for college and this was the first time all of them had the same week free of everything and anything, so they had decided it was way past the time they should have a get-together with the whole group. They had rented a beach house for the week to get a little holiday out of it as well. 

Tori found herself seated next to Beck on a couch in the living room. She had been one of the first ones to arrive. The only ones who had been there before her were Beck and Cat. Cat had ran out to the beach the second she had thrown her things inside. Unlike Beck and Tori who had wanted to look around the house and wait for the others. 

"Long time no see, huh?" Tori said once the silence in the room had gotten slightly awkward. 

"I guess. You being on tours and trying to study at the same time doesn't really help that. You're the one who stayed closest to home but the only person who's seen you since high school has been Andre."

"Yeah.. I've barely had any time off and when I've had that it's been at very random moments. I'm surprised you and Jade didn't come at the same time."

"She had some things she wanted to take care of first. She'll be here late if she's even gonna make it today."

"I take it you two aren't doing too well."

"Huh? Oh, we haven't been a thing in like three years. You're really behind on things."

"I.. Yeah I guess. I did see that you two broke up but it isn't like that hasn't happened a lot before."

"Have you seriously not used social media? Or do you just not follow Jade."

"After The Slap went down? No, I haven't followed Jade. The only ones I've been following since then from Hollywood Arts are you, Cat and Andre. Well and Trina, she would never stop bugging me about it if I didn't follow her."

"Well, you've missed a lot. Me and Jade isn't happening. And before you ask, no she isn't dating anyone and neither am I. She seems more happy with picking up someone from a bar for a night these days. And I just haven't met anyone yet."

"Yeah, I get that. I haven't really had any time for a relationship, so still single as ever."

"You'll get there. We both will", Beck said. 

"You definitely. You're the one who always had women lining up for you. Of course being semi famous has same thing happening to me but I can't just date a fan. I want to meet someone at a coffee shop or a mall or something normal, and get to know them. Not someone who screams my name and wants an autograph. But do you know how hard it is to find gay women? Maybe I should start hanging around lesbian bars more. Although that might end up in the tabloids and not end well…"

"Yeah, maybe leave the bars for a just couple nights a month. You will find someone eventually though. There's no way that you will be single for a long time. Maybe you'll meet some other semi famous woman at an awards show or something like that."

"Hah. We'll see. Ooh, speaking of semi famous lesbians. My record company has been trying to get in contact with Hayley Kiyoko to see if she would collab with me for a song or two for my next album."

"Well that sounds exciting. You two would make an awesome song, I'm sure. Do you think we should go check on Cat? It's been a while and no-one seems to be coming yet so we could go check the beach out."

"Yeah. Sounds good. Better than just camping in here."

* * *

Everyone except Jade had arrived and they were discussing about dinner plans. Tori thought they should wait for Jade before they would decide anything and Beck agreed with her while Robbie and Andre just said that, they were hungry and if she wasn't here then it was her fault. Cat was still not to be seen in the house after she had arrived but came in just that moment complaining that she wanted to go out and eat. 

"Oh, Jade isn't coming until tomorrow, so we should just go", she said after Beck and Tori had pointed out that Jade still hadn't arrived. 

"And you know this because?" Beck looked at the girl. 

"Sam texted me! She said that Jade won't be coming until tomorrow, so we shouldn't worry. I apparently just missed her when I left. That has happened a lot actually…"

Everyone else just said "oh" and nodded for a bit, but Tori just looked at Cat confused. 

"What has happened?"

"A lot of things! I saw a crab at the beach today and then there was this-", Cat was cut off by Tori, "No I meant Jade and Sam."

"Oh! Yeah, Jade comes over our place a lot. More often it's when I'm going somewhere for a longer time. And when I come back home, there she is! Sam always says that I just missed her coming when I had left. I don't know what they're doing since she usually doesn't stay for too long."

Tori just turned to look at Beck, "So that's what I've missed?"

"Yup. She's kind of, sort of dating Sam? Probably more in lines of friends with benefits but you know. She does pick up random girls at bars too but it's usually just Sam when she's in LA."

"Oh!" Cat smiled and jumped up and down for a little while and suddenly stopped and looked confused, "Wait, I don't understand. Why haven't they said anything?" 

"Jade and Sam haven't said anything to you because they aren't dating. Jade never speaks about these things, unless she's very drunk, and I guess this isn't something Sam speaks about either."

Cat seemed perfectly happy with this explanation and ran upstairs. Moments later she came back wearing new clothes, "Okay then, dinner?"

* * *

Dinner went past uneventful. Tori had hard time focusing on the conversation happening. Her mind kept drifting back to Jade and to the fact she apparently wasn't straight. And she was the last to know? Not that there would've been anything she would've done. Their relationship was messy enough as it is and Tori would never have the courage to actually tell Jade she used to be head over heels for her. Or was she still? She wasn't so sure anymore.

Rest of the day went past pretty much as a blur. No-one really paid attention to her spacing out and after someone actually said something about it, it was nearly 10pm and she just said she needed to sleep, that the jet lag from her European tour was still weighting her a little, and headed to bed. Where she ended up searching Jade's Instagram account and spent her time scrolling her posts until she fell asleep.

* * *

When Tori woke up the next morning she was in desperate need of a cold shower. She had seen a very not appropriate dream of Jade.

"Not over that crush then.." she mumbled to herself while she climbed out of bed and searched for her towel, toiletry bag and clothes. She peeked her head out of her room to see, if the bathroom was occupied and sighed in relief seeing it free. Quickly making her way there she heard Cat downstairs but paid no mind to it.

She took her time in the shower trying to get the image of Jade out of her mind. Drying her hair, brushing it and her teeth and finally dressing up, she went back to her room to leave her things there and putting her towel to dry. Then she headed downstairs for breakfast.

She rounded the corner to the kitchen and called out "morning" while opening the refrigerator. She got couple of "morning"s back but one of the voices got her frozen in the spot.

Jade. Jade was here. She took the yoghurt she was looking for and spinned around smile on her face, which everyone could tell wasn't real, "Jade, didn't know you got here already."

"Yeah. Umm.. Sam had work to get to so I left when she did." 

"Cool."

Then it was just quiet. Tori and Jade we're staring at each other the breakfast bar between them. 

Jade lifted an eyebrow, "Do you have something to say or did really come as such a big surprise to you?"

That got Tori moving again, "No, no. Just getting some breakfast."

And then everything was back to normal, or at least as normal as things could've been.

* * *

It had already gotten very late and Tori and Jade were the only ones awake. They had moved to the beach, with couple of their drink of choice, to not disturb the others while they slept. 

It had been mainly quiet drinking between the two until Jade spoke up, "I'm sorry."

"Uh… I don't think there's anything you should be apologizing for."

"Oh, there definitely is a lot of things I should apologize for, but this is mainly about how I treated you back at high school. You just always were you, you weren't afraid to be who you were. I guess that just made me even more pissed and I targeted all of that on you."

Tori laughed at that, "Oh, I definitely wasn't just me. I dated guys back then just because I was horrified of coming out. And you had your moments. To me it looked like you weren't afraid of anything. And even if you were a little mean to me at times and that at first I was afraid of you, it didn't mean that I would've felt any differently about you back then. I just knew there was something that needed a bit of fixing. So I tried my best. Even though you kept trying to push me away."

Jade had the most genuine smile on her face that Tori had ever seen, and it took a lot of willpower from Tori to not take her phone from her pocket and snap a picture of her to remember it forever. 

"But you weren't hiding yourself like I was. I knew that you weren't actually into those guys, that you'd rather date a girl. That was enough. You're a brilliant actress and if you really wanted to hide the truth you would've been able to do it."

"I thought I was being convincing. Though I guess that explains why no-one was surprised when I actually came out."

"Yeah, nothing convincing about you checking me out every time you thought I wasn't watching."

"I wasn't!"

"You tell yourself that Vega. No-one will believe you."

"Well you're really pretty, so what was I supposed to do."

"To not be like a horny teenager boy? Look, I get it, we were all teenagers, but usually girls don't check out other people like guys seem to. But really Vega? I know I'm pretty but you were worse than that puppet."

"Don't you dare to compare me to Rex. That's just mean."

"Chill out. I actually didn't mind it. I guess I liked the fact that I knew I was attractive to other girls as well. And you never tried anything else than to annoy me with your friendship crap. Even though all you actually wanted was to get in my pants but y'know, same difference I guess."

"I wasn't! I thought you were straight, so I really wanted to just be friends."

"Relax. I'm just fucking with you. I knew back then, but I tried not to. After that big break up with Beck I spent one night thinking what my life would be like, if I would be brave enough. To come out, and confront you about your feelings and see what mine actually were. If we'd get somewhere. There were a lot of 'if's and even more 'but's and in the end I just hated you a little bit more. That's how it always ended up," she finished her beer and laid back to the sand and stared at the stars above, "I was always really fucking terrified of actually admitting to myself that I was a little bit in love with you. Beck was safe and normal in the eyes of my father and rest of the world, but in the end he wasn't the one I was in love with anymore."

Tori just stared at her. She didn't believe what she had just heard and she didn't know what she could say. There was nothing really. Just as she was opening her mouth to say something, anything Jade groaned and ran a hand past her face. 

"I must be really drunk to be talking about feelings and shit with you."

They both chuckled and Jade turned her head to look at Tori, to really look at her. She had changed a little in the past five years, but not much. Just tiny little details she was probably the only one able to point out. She didn't remember sitting back up but at some point she had to have, since was in eye level with Tori, her hand on her cheek and Tori was leaning in the touch. They were so close, noses almost touching but she was afraid to make the next move. 

Tori must've seen the hesitation in her eyes, since she removed the hand from her cheek and kept it between her hands. 

"I'd really love to do this right now, but I'd rather wait until we're sober. I'd hate waking up tomorrow and not remember something I've wanted to happen for six years."

Jade pouted a little and Tori wasn't sure if anything was real anymore. 

"I guess you're right."

"I am. But…"

"But what Vega?"

"I wouldn't mind company in bed. I'm sorry but you definitely got the short end of the stick by arriving last and I'd hate to not offer a much better place to sleep."

"So, let's get this straight-"

"Nothing straight happening here Jade."

Jade rolled her eyes and continued, "You won't kiss me because were a bit too drunk, but you want me into your bed and sleep with you."

Tori punched her weakly to the shoulder, "All I'm offering here is a little bit of cuddling and a much nicer bed."

"Ugh. Should've guessed you're a cuddler."

"I can sleep alone too," Tori almost sang, stood up and headed towards the house. 

"Fine!" Jade shouted after her and got up to catch up to her, "Just so you know I'm doing this just because the bed I have really does suck."

"Whatever makes you sleep better, but I know the truth."

* * *

Tori woke up to an arm around her waist, weight of someone next to her and them breathing to her neck. Smile crept to her lips as she remembered last night's talk with Jade. She slowly slipped out of bed and headed downstairs to the kitchen. 

Beck and Andre were already awake and eating breakfast when she entered the room. A round of "good morning"s was exchanged between the three. Tori took half a cup of coffee with splash of milk and sat to one of the free bar stools at the counter. 

"You wouldn't know where Jade is? You two were the last ones awake last night, right? I wanted to talk to her but she wasn't in her room," Beck said after Tori had had her first sip of coffee. 

"Oh, um… Yeah, we were. We went to talk to my room after it got really dark outside and she passed out in my room."

Andre stared at her, "She didn't try and kill you or anything, right?"

Tori shook her head, "No. We just talked. She actually apologized for how she treated me back at high school. We had a good talk. The kind I wanted to have with her while in school. Just a normal conversation between friends."

The boys seemed fine with her answer but she felt like they didn't really believe her. They both knew about her old crush. Also she was pretty sure she was blushing like an idiot.

Tori finished her coffee and went to get a new cup and poured some coffee in it, added two sugars and headed back to upstairs, "Well I'll take this to her and maybe she'll wake up and be a bit nicer. I'm also gonna take a shower before she, Cat or Robbie wanna get in there, so you guys better have taken yours already if you were planning on that. Keep those pancakes warm. I want some when I come back down here."

She found Jade sitting up at the bed scrolling her phone when she entered her room again. 

"Oh, hey. Morning. I thought you'd still be asleep. You tended to sleep like a dead before and got up usually pretty late," Tori said handing the cup she was holding to Jade she continued, "Here. We stayed up pretty late so I thought this would make you feel better."

Jade mumbled her "thanks" and "morning" to her and accepted the mug. Placing her phone to the bedside table and cupping the mug in both of her hands. 

Tori just stood awkwardly there and scratched her neck with her left hand, "Look… I really wanna talk about last night but I really wanna get to the shower before Cat and Robbie try to get there. So I thought I'd head there right now and you can enjoy your coffee and wake up slowly. When I get back here we could talk. Sound good?"

Jade just nodded between sips of coffee. Tori shook her head slightly and smiled at her, "Okay. I'll just grab my towel and go then."

She didn't get very far though. Jade had grabbed her wrist and was pulling her towards the bed. 

"Jade I really wanna make it to the shower before the others."

"I know. I just," Jade started and placed her mug near her phone. She then used her now free left hand to cup the nape of Tori's neck and brought her closer. Tori almost forgot to breath, her eyes closing and then she felt a quick peck at the corner of her lips. 

She opened her eyes and saw Jade slightly smirking, coffee mug already in her hands. 

"Thought that would make you come back faster."

Tori grabbed her towel and clothes and headed towards the bathroom. Before she left the room though she glanced at Jade, "You're mean."

And so Jade was left alone to drink her coffee in Tori's bed. 

Jade was right though. Not more than 15 minutes later Tori was back. She was wearing her clothes for today, a very light pink tank top with some words written on it and jean shorts, and her hair was only towel dried and brushed. It still dropped little droplets of water. 

"That was fast," was all Jade said before she looked up from her phone, coffee already gone, and smirked at her, "You didn't even dry your hair."

"Yeah, yeah. Air drying it is very slow but better anyway."

Tori sat on the empty side of the bed facing Jade, "So…"

"So," Jade said placing her phone back to the bedside table. Giving Tori her full attention. 

"I just wanna know what you want. I know for sure what I want, and that's to be with you."

"I want the same thing you dummy, if I wasn't clear enough."

"Okay good. Because I heard some things from Beck that you haven't had a serious relationship in like three years and I just-"

"Wow, wow, wow," Jade cut Tori's rambling, "Beck said that?"

Tori nodded and Jade sighed, "Look. Beck doesn't know shit. Yeah I've mainly had one night stands and the thing with Sam, but I have dated. Or well tried. I'm apparently really hard person to be with for a long time. But this possibility to be with you? This I've wanted for a long time, even though I've tried not to."

Tori smiled, "Okay. Um, I know it would be very fast, but do you think we could tell the other's like today that we're gonna try and see where this takes, because I'm pretty sure I can't keep my eyes or my hands away from you now that I have the permission. And telling them is gonna be way less awkward than them starting to question us."

"Yeah. I guess we should. This is gonna be a lot to figure out though. You live in LA and I live in New York and long distance is rough. I guess I could try and find work in Hollywood but I have few projects I need to finish first."

Tori took Jade's hands in hers and looked her in the eye. 

"I know there's a lot we need to discuss but we've got rest of the week to figure everything out. Let's just enjoy of the time we know we have."

Jade smiled and gave Tori's hands a little tug pulling her to her lap. She placed her hands on her waist and kissed her, "Definitely," a kiss, "planning on," another, "doing that," one more, which almost turned into a full make out session but Jade ended it before it got that far.

"Now, get off the bed. You're dripping water," she pushed Tori lightly out of the bed. Who just rounded it to come and give her one more kiss. 

"You should probably try and head to the showers quickly too. I'll go and get us both breakfast, so when you get down you have plate of food waiting for you."

"Sounds like a plan," Jade said pulling Tori for one more kiss before she got up gathered her clothes and towel and she was out of the room. 

Tori just stood there looking at the closed door, "Yeah. I could get used to that."


End file.
